And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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