You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
