smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I party with great urgency now.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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