have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
