honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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