Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize