i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Randomize
