You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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