your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Randomize