We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize