i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
