Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
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this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
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I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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