lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Randomize