I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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