I could have mohawked her pubes.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
third nipple confirmed
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
