Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
