**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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