I want to walk on stilts...naked
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
