I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
