drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
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