Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
