eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
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