Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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