I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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