i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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