i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize