for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
