i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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