I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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