apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
You did what with his pubic hair?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
