I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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