Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
