I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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