I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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