you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
