White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
