the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
