Me too!
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
