I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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