This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
