and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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