the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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