He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
