I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
