Soap is not a condiment
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
