break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
