do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Randomize
