Yo dont text me then not text me
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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