If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I want her autograph on my taint
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
