what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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