so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Randomize
