Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I need water and some morals
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
