im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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