He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Randomize